sheepish
I have not posted in a week. partly because, yes, i have faltered a couple of times. Let me try to remember what my challenge actions were this week-
*Finally got in touch with and spent time with another friend I had lost touch with for years. I am happy to have put a step towards rekindling our friendship. This made me realize that it is not always just about "clicking" with friends. It takes a big, consistent effort on both parts to carry on a friendship, especially when you don't have obvious life factors bringing out together, like being part of the same circle, or going to the same school.
*Bought a Lego set for my brother and I to spend some quality time together. Thought the time has not yet been spent, I know I did my part in reaching out and creating a thread for us to connect, and I know the Legos will soon be put to use. (Legos have a connection from our childhood)
*Went into work much earlier than usual to finish up a project deadline that I had set for myself. LOVED leaving at a freakishly early hour.
I've realized that most of my resolutions have been social. I think it takes a great deal of proactive effort to maintain relationships, which is easy to forget and take for granted. It usually does take one person reaching out because it's so easy to get caught up in daily life, that we forget how much the things that we consider to be "nice to have but ok to lose" could be so great if we acted on them. It might also mean that this is on the easier end of the spectrum of things I've been putting off... but then again, I've been putting it off for the same reasons as the more "difficult" things, so maybe not. I know myself enough to have an idea of which situations and people bring out the best in me. And often I forget that I need to surround myself with them to be on that track. When I need to remember how my best feels, it takes effort to remember to seek out the situation and people, instead of hope it shows up and be complacent when it doesn't.
*To me, being proactive is also about having difficult conversations that are easy to put off. I talked to my brother about how much it hurt me that he lied about a tournament he was competing in just so I wouldn't show up to watch him compete. It was a difficult conversation to have and he did not respond anywhere near what I would have liked to hear, but I know I did my part and I know it made an impact.
- more to come
*Finally got in touch with and spent time with another friend I had lost touch with for years. I am happy to have put a step towards rekindling our friendship. This made me realize that it is not always just about "clicking" with friends. It takes a big, consistent effort on both parts to carry on a friendship, especially when you don't have obvious life factors bringing out together, like being part of the same circle, or going to the same school.
*Bought a Lego set for my brother and I to spend some quality time together. Thought the time has not yet been spent, I know I did my part in reaching out and creating a thread for us to connect, and I know the Legos will soon be put to use. (Legos have a connection from our childhood)
*Went into work much earlier than usual to finish up a project deadline that I had set for myself. LOVED leaving at a freakishly early hour.
I've realized that most of my resolutions have been social. I think it takes a great deal of proactive effort to maintain relationships, which is easy to forget and take for granted. It usually does take one person reaching out because it's so easy to get caught up in daily life, that we forget how much the things that we consider to be "nice to have but ok to lose" could be so great if we acted on them. It might also mean that this is on the easier end of the spectrum of things I've been putting off... but then again, I've been putting it off for the same reasons as the more "difficult" things, so maybe not. I know myself enough to have an idea of which situations and people bring out the best in me. And often I forget that I need to surround myself with them to be on that track. When I need to remember how my best feels, it takes effort to remember to seek out the situation and people, instead of hope it shows up and be complacent when it doesn't.
*To me, being proactive is also about having difficult conversations that are easy to put off. I talked to my brother about how much it hurt me that he lied about a tournament he was competing in just so I wouldn't show up to watch him compete. It was a difficult conversation to have and he did not respond anywhere near what I would have liked to hear, but I know I did my part and I know it made an impact.
- more to come
posted by the lovechild of dorothy parker and oscar wilde @ 12:10 AM
1 Comments:
At June 5, 2009 at 11:33 PM,
flyinginmyairplane said…
Only a fool wouldn't see you for what you really are. And what you really are is truly something else, my dear. You're something bigger, brighter, wiser... something you yourself don't remember often enough: just plain wonderful.
It takes a strong person to think about these things in such depth with so much consideration- friendship, self forgiveness compared to self-accountability. And to then go and produce such a carefully crafted yet empowering statement with that ability, now that requires an even stronger person.
You inspire me.
(You can quote me on that!)
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